I know it sounds cliché, but meditation, and especially breathwork, have been essential for me in my healing process. From the initial experience of loss, white-knuckling my way through pregnancy after loss, and even now when the feelings creep their way back into my mind and life.

When I find myself needing to work through the hard stuff, there are a few different tips I’ve picked up over the years to make breathwork and meditation all the more supportive, and I hope these simple adjustments are healing to you too:

1. Meditate lying down. Despite being many years into my own meditation practice (I’m even certified in teaching others!), I find guided meditations helpful in quieting and focusing my monkey mind. Instructors often suggest certain positions to complete the meditation, but if you’re in a period of working through grief or other difficult emotions, I highly recommend breaking the rules and lying down on your back. Get crazy and put a pillow or bolster under your knees or over your hips. If you fall asleep in this more supportive and nourishing position, well then, that’s probably just what you needed at the time.

2. Keep your palms facing down or on the body. Similarly, instructors may suggest certain hand positions or mudras. They may offer options, like palms facing up for receiving energy and palms facing down for calming energy. I find in tough times keeping your palms down no matter what is best—even if you’re so tired and think receiving some energy might be nice. Whether they are down on your knees, your heart, your belly, or a combination, these hand positions tend to be more grounding and soothing.

3. Do breathwork before meditating. I would recommend this to anyone, but especially when we need extra help regulating our nervous system. Breathwork is a powerful tool for turning off our autonomous nervous system (responsible for the fight, flight, or freeze response) and moving into your parasympathetic nervous system, allowing your body to move into a “rest and digest” state. Even just a few rounds of even breathing, 4-6 breathing, or box breathing can help you have a much more focused and productive meditation session.

Finally, just keep practicing. For many people, it can be hard to be with your thoughts, even on the best of days. Try a few minutes each day, and don’t worry about doing it “right”. You deserve a practice that is comforting and supportive to you, and I hope these suggestions help you find even just a little more peace in your next meditation or breathwork session.